Dog Sitting and Bored

what

the hell does Dawn have to say?? she's canadian ffs

what

what

dawn is a fake canadian. She doesnt even have the canadian flag on her elbow pads

what

neither did bret hart, are you even canadian?

krzy who the fuck are you

Voice Promo

Vincent begin his tread down the isle, his gay lover's hand in his. The equally homosexual priest stood at the end of the Chapel, an open gay bible in his hand and a warm smile on his face. Voice had been waiting for this day for so long and now...

Vincent and his partner Eduardo stood side by side as the priest cleared his gay throat.

Priestman McGoo

Vincent Kennedy Abernathy, do you take Eduerdo Gonzolez Zoran Valquez Medic as your lawfully wedded husband.

Voice looked to Eduardo with longing eyes.

Voice
I do.

Eduardo, do you take Vincent Kennedy Abernathy IV as your lawfullu wedded husband.

Eduardo
Aye papi.

Priestman McGoo
Without further ado, you may mow kiss the groom.

Voice looked at Eddy with love and the thought of the future as he leaned into kiss his husband.

Excerpt from 'Voice of the Loveless' a Gay Novel by T.E. LaFave

Sanders Promo

Bryan Jackson Sanders approached a local Kentucky Fried Chicken with a M4A1 Carbine in hand and a disgruntled expression on his face. He kicked the glass door open and fired 3 rounds into the ceiling as the customers enjoying their chicken screamed and scrambled. He rushed the counter. The cashier began emptying the till of the money but was stopped when the barrel of the assault rifle was pushed into the lips of the unlucky fast food employee.

Sanders
Did I say I wanted money?

Nervously the cashier put his hands up.

Sanders
Is Colonel Sanders in?

With the cold barrel of the automatic weapon still placed firmly in his mouth he tried to speak.

Cashierguy McGee
Heeth Dead

Sanders
What?

Cashierguy McGee
Heeth dead, heeths been dead

Sanders paused and nearly throttled the weapon in his esophagus.

Sanders
THE COLONEL!!

With a quick movement the cashier pushed the gun out pf his maw and spoke clearly.

Cashierguy McGee
Whats the matter with you, I say you he dead!!

Sanders dropped his rifle and stumbled back, Colonel Avery Sanders, Bryan's CO for several campaigns had been dead all along...
Unable to face the grief, Bryan pulled an M9 from his holster, he placed it against his temple and before pulling the trigger, he shed a single tear...

Excerpt from 'Finding Col. Sanders' a short story by T.E. LaFave

Tim Promo

Tim LaFave awoke suddenly, his vision blurry as if he'd been asleep for months. Even with his eyes open he still could not see. Darkness. He lifted his arms but his atrophic arms would not move. Was this his life now, a mere husk of his former self. Tim quickly tried to recall his most recent memory and in that instance he felt a sharp pain in his neck.

Tim
Frank...

Tim still could not see, but his anger lifted his arms for him he placed his hands ahead of him and felt a solid surface before him... or was it... above him? Tim realized he was lying down. But where? He knocked on the "wall" above him and a thick, wooden knock sounded. He then tried to extend both arms to his left and right but was stopped.

Just then it occurred to him. He was in a coffin. Did Frank kill him? Was this LaFave's fate, being literally buried by the Alpha Male?

Tim could do nothing but wait. Alone in the coffin.

Excerpt from 'To Live and Die in CMV' by T.E. LaFave

Cyborg Promo

Cecil George Dax lived in the Ether sitting in an Embryonic sphere, he watched the universe as it passed him by, slow then fast then slow again, events in the quantum field passing him by all at the same time. One particular event saw a tall man, covered im green armor, entertaining thousands. Cecil was unpleased with this event so he removed it from The Stream. He placed a new event in its stead. Cecil looked at another event. The Cataclysmic event that would devastate the cosmos. He was displeased with this event, so he removed it. He placed a new event in it's stead. A tall man, in green armor, would set in motion the End of all Worlds.

This pleased Cecil.

Excerpt from 'Origins: Cyborg' by T.E. LaFave.

gonna need an audio clip of you reading that