Re: "Scumbag" Teddy (Black Bear, but commonly misheard as Blackbeard) Soloway IV of the Isles of Skellige

by **krzy** Wed Dec 14, 2016 3:38 pm

Picture this: security cam footage shows Teddy Soloway walking in a cafeteria with his tray piled high with as much food as it could hold, and then some. Soloway looks and he looks until he spots a table that completely empty, the perks of choosing to eat while everyone is preparing for their match. He takes a seat, rubs his hands together in childish glee at the sight of the food he’s about to consume then gets ready to dig in.

Wait.

Teddy realizes that he forget to grab any kind of utensil, and eating such a delicious meal without any kind of utensil is beneath a man such as himself. Teddy pounds both fists on the table in anger, and screams out, “Guy!” as if it was somehow the interviewer’s fault that he didn’t think he’d need a fork to eat.

Soloway shakes his head as he rises from his feet, precious time of his meal’s peak warmth slipping away with every second he wastes. Soloway dashes away as if he were in another impromptu footrace with Bob Storm.

Almost immediately after Soloway leaves the scene, Bryan Sanders enters from the opposite side with his own tray of food. Sanders sees that the table has only one other person sitting at it and sits at the absolute opposite end of the table.

It’s then that Soloway returns, and, upon seeing Sanders, sitting at HIS table, Soloway gets pissed.

Soloway: What the hell do you think you’re doing?

Sanders slowly lowers his fork, unsure what to make of this sudden confrontation.

Sanders: What kind of question is that?

Soloway tosses down his fork in anger. It lands on the ground with a clatter.

Soloway: Can’t you see the table is occupied?

Sanders: By one person?

Soloway: You some kind of architect? Telling me how much space I can and can’t use?

Sanders: Look, man, I don’t know what your deal is, but I’m just trying to finish my lunch.

Soloway: Yeah, how nice it must be to want eat your food in peace, shame you’re the one making life difficult for me?

Sanders: We’d be sitting nowhere near each other! Why are you making such a big deal out of it?

Soloway walks around the table so that he’s standing right next to Sanders.

Soloway: You think you can just mess with people? Toy with their lives? I earned this spot at the table. I earned the right to enjoy my food without having to worry about guys like you breathing into my plate.

Sanders: You’ve got to be kidding me.

Sanders tries to stand to end this random confrontation once and for all, when suddenly Soloway slaps the tray forward, spilling its contents all over Sanders. Sanders leaps out of his seat and scrambles to clean the mess off of him.

Soloway: Enjoy your meal.

Soloway goes to grab his tray, and frowns when he sees his fork on the ground where he dropped it.

Soloway: And now my fork is dirty, you son of a bitch.

by **krzy** Sun Dec 18, 2016 2:11 am

Picture this: a sweaty, but pleased Teddy Soloway has met up backstage with his personal interviewer, Guy.

Soloway: Look, Guy, before we start I just want to ask what’s going on back here?

Guy: Well...as it’s become customary to do, I’m about to interview you after your match.

Soloway: No, I’m talking about the lack of balloons, and streamers and cake and women dressed up like me to celebrate the fact that I’ve done what no man has ever done before! My winning streak has reached double digits! I’m talking about the big ten-oh, but leave it to you to ruin it all by not having the courtesy to think about anyone other than yourself.

Guy: Teddy, how was I supposed to know that you would even win?

Soloway: You’re kidding, right?

Guy: I’m just say--

Soloway: What you’re saying is that you doubted me?

Guy: No, it’s..

Soloway: That you thought that poor excuse for a dancer could honestly test me?

Guy: It’s just--

Soloway: That we live in a universe where “Scumbag” Teddy (Blackbear,

Guy: Oh my God….

Soloway: but Commonly Misheard as Blackbeard) Soloway IV of the Isles of Skellige could lose to any of these so-called wrestlers on this roster.

Guy: What do you mean “so-called” they are wrestlers!

Soloway: Yeah, then why did Anthony Brown try to turn the match into an impromptu dancing contest? He thought he could switch the game up and change the rules, but Teddy Soloway is like a chameleon a master of adaptability. Hmm..Chameleon, maybe we should add that to my name...

Guy: Maybe not. So you’re telling that the reason you beat Anthony Brown tonight is because you danced better than he did?

Soloway: Did you see that grade-school level stuff he tried busting out? This is the big leagues, you either bring your best stuff or you stay home, and the fact of the matter is that the fans may think that he deserves to be in the chamber over the likes of me, but I proved tonight that their votes don’t matter. What they think don’t matter. What does matter is who can get it done in the middle of the ring, and for ten-straight matches, I’ve shown that there just ain’t nobody bet…

Soloway is interrupted as Bryan Sanders approaches from the other side of the frame.

Guy: This is a surprise, folks, please welcome at this time...Bryan San….

Soloway: No! Don’t welcome this clown. Who do you think you are waltzing up to another man’s private interview without an invitation?

Sanders: Thanks for having me, Guy. By the way, is that even your real name?

Guy: Actually, it’s…

Soloway: You sit at my table, you come out of nowhere to crash my interview...do you not know what personal boundaries mean?

Sanders: Oh, I do, Teddy, and you threw that all out of the window last week when you decided that you were going to knock my lunch all over me.

Soloway: Are you still mad about that? Some people would have eaten that off the floor! Hell, at the rate Anthony Brown’s career is going after I embarrassed him, he might have gladly taken whatever was left off your hands. So how about you get out of my face with your first world problems.

Sanders: First world problems? You mean something along the lines of acting like a child because somebody sat at the same table as you? That’s funny. I forgot that somewhere along the line we’ve ended up back in high school.

Soloway: That was different! You--

Sanders: I’m going to give you a chance to right that wrong, before things get even more out of hand.

Soloway: What do you want me to do? Take you out for a meal? Wash your clothes? With the way you’re acting, I’m surprised you’re not standing here butt naked because you’re behaving like you’ve only got that one outfit.

Sanders: You’re not that far off, actually.

Sanders fishes out a piece of paper from his pocket.

Sanders: This is my dry cleaning bill for $24.72. I expect it to be taken care of sooner rather than later.

Sanders forcefully shoves the paper into Soloway’s chest until Soloway takes it from him. Soloway looks down at the paper, then back up at Sanders. It takes a moment for him to process what happened, but once he figures it out, he bursts out laughing!

Soloway: Okay, buddy, I’ll start looking.

Sanders: For the money?

Soloway: For somebody who gives a crap! OHHHHHHHHH!!!

Soloway continues screaming as he walks off and his voice trails off in the distance.

Guy: Not to take sides or anything, Bryan, but this did seem like an odd move.

Sanders: Look, it’s not about the money or the clothes or the food...even if that was my favorite pair of jeans. It’s about respect. People look at me or they hear my name and they think that just because I’m not a “star” on this brand, that I don’t matter. What Soloway did to me last week was the embodiment of that attitude.

Guy: The idea that you’re lesser than everyone else.

Sanders: Right. Soloway shows up and he gets the matches and the spotlight while a guy like me has been busting my tail for years just to get management to remember that I’m on the payroll. I’m not going to complain about what’s fair and what’s not or what’s right and what’s wrong..life is gonna be the way that it is. But, I’m a man, guy. I’m a human being, and there’s only so much that I can take before I have to say enough is enough.

Guy: What’s the endgame for this? For as long as I’ve known Teddy, it just doesn’t seem like he’s actually going to foot that bill.

Sanders: The thing about Soloway is that no matter what he says, he’s a man and a human being too. A man that has weaknesses and fears and flaws and bleeds the same color that I do. But, to answer your question, I...I just don’t know what the endgame is. All I know is that I’m tired of being in the background, and if nothing else I’m going to try my damndest to show that if given the same chances that Soloway’s been given, I could shine even brighter.

Sanders walks off and the screen fades to black.

by **krzy** Mon Dec 26, 2016 9:46 pm

Picture This: After a disheartening loss to the combined might of Teddy Soloway and Zack Starr, Bryan Sanders is shown walking to his car. Except he can’t get to it because Teddy Soloway has blocked it off with his own vehicle.

Soloway: HEY LOSER!! TRY NOT BEING AN INNOCENT BYSTANDER AND FIGHT BACK! ELEVEN AND ZERO BABY!!!

Soloway peels off revealing that he spray painted “LOSER” on Sanders’ rear window. Sanders throws down his bag in frustration, shouting out that Soloway is going to get what’s coming to him as the screen fades to black.

by Topher Mod Mon Dec 26, 2016 9:49 pm

wait Gumble owns Teddy?

edit: dammit why is every fuxker having same name as someone else..... should i be called MaurieIsntIsland ?

by Borton Mon Dec 26, 2016 9:55 pm

Bahaahha Teddy is the best

by **krzy** Wed Jan 04, 2017 4:31 pm

Picture this: Just before the main event of Intensity begins, Teddy Soloway stands backstage with now-personal interviewer now-known as “Guy.”

Guy: Teddy, I bet I know exactly what you’re going to say.

Soloway: Oh?

Guy: Yeah! You’re going to stand here, crack some jokes and brag about how you’re inexplicably 12-0. And that’s not even taking into account the fact that you have lost before. You’ll say you’re 12-0 because despite not even having a match tonight, you..oh, hell, I don’t know how the hell your mind works.

Soloway: You know something, Guy? I can’t say that I’ve been liking this attitude change ever since Bryan Sanders strolled around parking up the wrong tree.

Guy: What does Sanders have to do with anything?

Soloway: I didn’t tell the clown to go sitting where he wasn’t wanted, and I sure as hell didn’t tell him to not show up to fight in that tag team match. Yet somehow it’s me that’s the bad guy. The way I see it is that Sanders was the bully who tried to intrude on my personal space forcing me to valiantly fight him off. And the tag team match? I was showing that I could carry the team. It’s not like I spiked the clown’s punch before the match or anything. Yet after everything we’ve been through, me and you, from Raw to NXT, you’ve turned your back to me.

Guy: What? I haven’t taken any sides! Your antics can be amusing, I must admit, but the whole table drama was the most petty thing I’ve seen in quite some time. I’m just calling it like I see it.

Soloway: And that’s the problem: you shouldn’t be calling anything, but asking questions.

Guy: Oh my god.

Soloway: Anyway, the reason why I’m 12-0 tonight is because I made a bet that Tops Newsome would win tonight, and so he did, against all odds.

Guy: Is it even illegal to bet on wrestling while you’re a wrestler?

Soloway: Now you want to ask questions as you try to get me locked up. Nice try, but it wasn’t for money. Just know that I can dare you to do anything that I want now.

Guy: I can only imagine the kind of dare…. Wait..you bet me?

Soloway: Yeah.

Guy: When?

Soloway: Look, that doesn’t matter.

Guy: Oh my god...

Soloway: The point is….

Sanders: The point is that you like running your mouth, running from fights and running from your debts.

Soloway: You can’t just interrupt a private conversation like that.

Sanders: Private in the middle of the hallway? And why are you in front of the….

Soloway: You don’t ask the questions here. Guy does. Guy, ask a question.

Guy: Well, why are we in front of the…

Soloway: Again taking his side. Unbelievable! You know why they kept us together, Guy? Because we equal ratings! Money! This clown has none of that. He’s always asking me to pay for everything!

Sanders: You just need to pay me what you owe me, you ass! $24.72 for my clothes and now you can slap on another $63.29 to get that paint off the back of my car window.

Soloway: How do you even know it was me?

Sanders: Are you ki--Guy, is he ser--No, I’m not letting you do this. Either you pay up, or you meet me in that ring come UnChained and we’ll settle our differences like men. I told you before, and I’ll say it again. It’s not even about the money, and I don’t really care if you never pay me back. What this IS about is respect. Respect from you and from all of the people you laugh when they hear my name and say that I’ve reached my peak. I’m not going to let you walk all over me and treat me like garbage all while thinking you can get away with it.

Soloway: Well, if you’ll excuse me, I have better things to do than to answer your challenge.

Sanders: Better things like what?

Soloway steps through the door behind him. The cameraman zooms out to dramatically reveal they were in front of a bathroom all this time. Soloway locks the door behind him and a toilet flushes soon after.

Sanders: Why would he even flu--

Sanders cuts himself off as he spots something off to the side. Laying on the ground is a pile of Soloway’s bags, he must have been on his way out of the arena before stopping to do this interview. On top of the bags is Soloway’s precious trombone. There’s a note that reads: Do Not Touch: Property of “Scumbag” Teddy (Blackbear, but Commonly Misheard as (Please turn over for full name)

Sanders swats the note aside and takes the trombone. A mischievous smile appears on his face as the screen fades.

by **krzy** Fri Jan 06, 2017 5:43 pm

Picture this: In the conclusion of the above scene where Sanders stands in the hallway with Soloway’s precious trombone in his hands, Guy steps forward wearing a concerned expression.

Guy: I’m not so sure that’s the best idea, Bryan. Two wrongs and all that.

Sanders: So you’re saying I should do nothing to get back at him? To make him feel the same way I felt?

Guy: Just...just maybe this isn’t the best way to go about things. You take the high road and maybe show that you can be the better man about this.

Sanders: Better man...better man…Better man doesn’t get you too far in this business, much less this world. I’m living proof of that. I’m the one trying to make a name for myself without stepping on anyone to get there. Yet here I am without anything to show for that.

Guy: Soloway isn’t even that bad of a guy he just...like to have fun, I guess.

Sanders: Fun at my expense, and that’s when it become a problem.

Sanders sets down the trombone.

Sanders: I’ll settle this another way.

Which brings us to this week, with Sanders now watching as Teddy Soloway celebrates a major victory over the Global Champion. After playing a victory tune on that trombone, Soloway asks for a microphone a starts speaking as soon as he receives it.

Soloway: Woo! There’s no way you could have expected anything less! I’m undefeated for a reason and that’s because when it’s time to perform on the big stage, I show up, and I get the job done. Let’s not forget that I already beat like half the guys in the chamber like it was nothing, and now i’ve beaten the clown with the big belt. Now I don’t even need a belt to prove it when I say that I am just better than everyone else.

Soloway grins wide despite the crowd booing him.

Soloway: And you don’t even have to take my word for it. Look! Ask my good friend Bryan Sanders who had a first-row seat to a marquee match he’d never even be considered to be a part of, much less win. Oh, you thought you’d distract me, didn’t you, Bryan? What a shame. Little did you know that I love an audience. Next time don’t be so selfish, man. Bring a friend or two, buy that friendship if you have to. Hell, everyone will want to fake being friends with you anyway if it means being ringside at the most spectacular specimen to ever step foot in this company.

Soloway laughs gleefully, full reveling in this moment. The worst part being that there were no cheap shots, no shenanigans, Soloway was simply better than Vindy tonight, and you can’t take that away from him.

Soloway: The numbers don’t lie. I beat the Global Champion Voice Vindy, who beat Zack Starr who beat Aaron Waite. That’s three in one shot. Call it fifteen and ZERO! There is no stop--

Sanders: Teddy...Teddy! Easy there, you’re getting yourself all worked up over all of this. Just relax. Look, I’ll admit that I’m a little offended, and not by what you just said about me, I’ve known you long enough to figure out that you’re an insecure, pathological liar who can’t be taken seriously. But it did hurt my feelings when you went on that little spiel and didn’t even think to thank me.

Soloway: Thank you?!

Sanders: Ah, there it is. I appreciate it, buddy. You are absolutely welcome.

The crowd laughs as Sanders gets Soloway to walk right into that.

Sanders: But yes, thank me because it was my being out here that inspired you to go above what everybody expected you to do. So I feel like I should reap a little bit of these rewards. Since apparently this wasn’t just an ordinary match, I’d like to officially announce that I am current three and ZERO!

Soloway’s eyes fly open in shock and the crowd quickly adds salt to the wounds with their chant of three and ze-ro.

Soloway: NO! NOOOOOO! You can’t be... you...three and...NO! I’m the one that’s undefeated! Me! You’re making it all up.

Sanders: Which reminds me, Teddy. That $24.72 you owed me for my clothes? Forget about it! An anonymous fan footed the bill. I’d consider that a personal victory for myself, wouldn’t you? So I guess we can make it four and zero now!

Soloway: STOP THAT!

Sanders: Oh yeah! That $63.29 for the car window? Water under the bridge! As it turn out one of the workers there is a fan and decided that the repair would actually be on the house. What a great bit of luck that was. For those of you keeping score, I believe that puts me at a whopping five and zero!

Soloway: Those weren’t even matches! And how can you say you beat anyone when you never step foot inside of this ring? You’re a hypocrite and a fraud.

Sanders: I don’t know, Teddy. If you don’t like this little streak I’ve been on, it would seem there’s only one way for you to personally put an end to it, now isn’t there?

The crowd pops and their cheers are the seal of approval on this potential match.

Soloway: You me in that ring so bad? Fine, you got it! I’m going to put an end to you and that fake streak of yours!

Sanders: Sounds fine to me, Teddy. See you at UnChained.

With a smirk on his face from what he’s been able to accomplish, Sanders walks off to prepare for this battle.

by **krzy** Mon Jan 09, 2017 1:35 pm

Picture this: The opening pyro show of UnChained has just completed; the crowd is rowdy; the atmosphere is electric; every body is ready for the show of their lives.

When Bryan Sanders’ theme hits the crowd goes wild, a surprisingly strong reaction for a man who hardly used to get much fanfare at all. That’s the power of passion that these people are feeding off of right now.

They’re not just cheering for him because of the hype of this pay per view event finally getting underway.

This is a genuine reaction to seeing a man who desperately wants to leave a mark on the business making his way out to fight for his pride and for respect. For so long Sanders has just been the man who is simply...there. A match here and there, maybe picking up a fan among those who truly root for the forsaken, the underdogs. Now he has a chance to make an impact on a big stage against an opponent who definitely has created some buzz for himself. A match that can make or break his career.

It helps that “Scumbag” Teddy… whatever the hell his name is, makes it so easy to dislike him. A man who has accomplished nothing acting like he has the whole world in the palm of his hand is begging for somebody to put him in his place. The jovial attitude, the lies, the hypocrisy, the poor trombone playing--there have to be thousands of people in this packed arena who are dying to see somebody shut Soloway up once and for all.

Sanders could be that guy.

The man who claimed to be 5-0 to make the allegedly 15-0 Soloway enraged enough to finally agree to wrestle him like a man, has made it midway down the ramp. He pauses now to soak in this moment. So many wrestlers on this card have been in and around the main event scene so long that moments like this must feel like an eternity ago. But for Sanders this is his here and now. Though one day he hopes he’ll be the last man to make his entrance on a show, not the first.

He looks around the arena and the men, women and children all cheering for him. How good that must feel. They want him to win, to take this big step in career. A woman in the front row even has a “Can’t put a price on respect!” sign in reference to the money Sanders claimed Soloway owed him which is what added fuel to the fire.

With a smile on his face, Sanders jogs over to the woman and doesn’t hesitate to autograph that sign to her delight. Then he poses for a picture with her and the half dozen other fans who try to squeeze into the shot.

BAM!

Like a runaway train plowing into a stalled car, Teddy Soloway drives himself into Sanders, sending his opponent for tonight sailing down the ramp. The momentum leads Sanders to hit the steel with a crash before rolling down to the foot of the ramp.

Just like the attitude of the building has completely shifted.

It was a room full of hype and hope--full of people eagerly waiting to see a great match. It doesn’t look like they’re getting anything now. The boos are a reflection of that acknowledgement. And now that Sanders’ music has been cut off, those boos are all you can hear. It fills the arena and spills out through the cracks in the wall. This was supposed to be Sanders’ night, his chance to break through the glass ceiling, but it’s all been taken away from him by the undisputed most selfish guy on the roster.

The worst part is that Soloway either doesn’t care, or is truly oblivious about why his actions warrant such a heated, negative reaction. Both options are equally frustrating. Either way, Soloway stands there and laughs over Sanders’ fallen body, pouring buckets of salt over gaping wounds. The force of the initial impact that he couldn’t brace for, combined with the ugly landing on the unbiased, ungiving ground has put Sanders in a tough spot.

It’s taking him some time to catch his breath and process what just happened to him, and with every second it takes him to peel himself off the ground, the anticipation within the crowd to see him get his retribution builds. He pushes himself up to his hands and his knees, coughing violently while trying to shake to the cobwebs out to clear his head. Out of nowhere Soloway drives his fist into Sanders’ face knocking him back down.

Just like that the life is sucked out of the building. That glimmer of possibility gone. Sanders was completely blindsided from the word go and Soloway wisely never let him come to his senses. Soloway laughs some more and walks over to the timekeeper’s area to retrieve a microphone.

“Well what do you know,” he says, well screams over the pissed off crowd. “My good friend, just doesn’t seem fit to compete.”

Soloway walks over to where he left Sanders on the ground. “I guess that means, that I’ve won this little battle of ours.” Soloway smiles the smile of a man who doesn’t realize a vast majority of the people here dislike him.

“Which that I, the man who pinned your Global Champion has moved up to 16-0!” He raises his arms in victory, but he’s the only one celebrating that so-called achievement.

“Not only that, but it’s only right that I absorb this clown’s questionable 5-0 streak as my own, giving me a respectable 21-0 undefeated record in this company.”

Soloway says that all without a hint of irony.

“It’s only right that I move on to bigger and better things, after this--things like getting my rightful title matches. Not only did that dancing clown Anthony Brown getting into that chamber after I beat him, but I couldn’t even make it to my World Title match against Vindy, and now he’s facing the guy who embarrassed this brand at Showdown.”

Soloway looks down at Sanders. “Hate it had to be you.”

He drops the microphone and turns to walk away, but Sanders was only playing possum! He tackles Soloway from behind sending both men crashing down to the ground. As Soloway lays on his stomach and tries to cover up, Sanders mounts and unleashed a barrage of lefts and rights, not caring where they hit as long as knuckles meet flesh and that that flesh is attached to Teddy Soloway.

Sanders wants Soloway to feel pain.

Sanders wants Soloway to feel regret.

Sanders wants to beat Soloway until he’s just a mass of flesh and bone on this ramp and the crowd is cheering him on every step of the way. Soloway jerks himself to the side causing Sanders to slip off, then Soloway desperately tries to crawl away looking satisfyingly pathetic for a man who was unjustifiably confident just a minute ago.

Sanders manages to grab Soloway by the ankles preventing any kind of escape. Soloway unsteadily rises to his feet on one leg then spins himself so that he and Sanders are face to face. The crowd is on fire now, dying for Soloway to get his comeuppance, especially after what he just pulled tonight. Even Sanders is starting to feel like, looking Soloway dead in the eyes and saying that he’s getting carried out in a body bag tonight.

Soloway’s eyes widen in fair as those words sink in. He’s not trying to go out like that. He reaches out with his hands to try to slap Sanders in the face, but not only is Sanders too far away, but every swipe threatens to send Soloway tumbling to the ground, putting him in a vulnerable position that he’d rather not be in again.

Ready to make good on his promise is Sanders to tosses down Soloway’s leg, then drives his shoulder into Soloway’s gut, pushing him backward until Soloway’s back crashes into the minitron. Soloway frantically drives a couple of elbows into Sanders upper back to get him to quit it, but Sanders is too hoppped up on adrenaline to let the pain get to him. Instead, Sanders drives Soloway spine-first into the minitron again and again and again until Soloway fall to his knees and becomes dead weight that Sanders can’t keep on his feet.

Sanders backs up and drags his thumb along the base of his throat, his intentions clear. He races forward with every malicious intention to sandwich Soloway’s head between his boot and the minitron, but Soloway thwarts those plans by narrowly dodging it.

Sanders’ foot crashes into the screen sending shockwaves of pain rippling up his right leg. He limps around as Soloway gets to his feet. Sanders turns around and Soloway pokes him in both eyes! The cheap move stuns Sanders long enough for Soloway to make a beeline out of the arena to the dismay of the crowd. Sanders leans against the wall and rubs his reddening, watery eyes.

His night ruined, and his star-making match put on hold--all his can do now is trudge backstage in disappointment.

by Topher Mod Mon Jan 09, 2017 2:19 pm

is steven spielgberg gonna make this promo into a movie, didn't read that much when i was in school ffs.... gg tho

by **krzy** Mon Jan 09, 2017 3:27 pm

just trying to get sanders over
pls buy his shirt

by Topher Mod Mon Jan 09, 2017 3:32 pm

how much?

by Borton Mon Jan 09, 2017 3:38 pm

I read all of that during school

bless <3

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