This year in Retrospect

I normally don't do these kinds of things, but I think this is the best Time to do so.

Second season here and at 21 years of age, its been an amazing ride that I wouldn't trade. But I wanna get a bit more personal.

Earlier this year, in February, I got into an accident on my way to play airsoft for the first time. No one was hurt, but the accident could have changed my life for the worse considering there was a 14 year old girl in the other car. [size=33]In spite of not hurting anyone, the crash got me into a huge depression. I had just left my seasonal work at PetSmart, the best job I personally ever had, and was now worried about getting stuck with lawsuits and no money to pay for a car. However, my family was worried because, had I gone a few feet further when the wreck happened, I would've had my pelvis crushed and possibly have been paralyzed or even killed. Luckily, none of that happened.[/size]


[size=33]Funnily enough, this was happening around the beginning of the season when we had the angle of Wolf's losing streak and suspension. So I wasnt doing well in CMV and Real-life.[/size]


Ever since that wreck, I was dealing with more rough times. The late grandad that I respected had turned out to be a pedophile and committed suicide to not pay for what he did and my dad retired from 20 years on the Georgia DNR after his back completely gave out on him. It was honestly a very vulnerable time in life for me and my family.

However, throughout this rough time,  I stayed here on CMV and enjoyed every second. It was one of my few coping mechanisms and has been an amazing experience.

In spite of how controversial my CAWs have been, especially with Ascendance season where it felt like everyone was caving in on me because of Wolf, I still enjoyed every second.

I just wanted to thank you guys for making this season one of the best and putting a smile on my face throughout it. I hope next season will be just as great.

Oh, and i managed to get my car back in two months! Turns out it wasnt totaled and the family I wrecked with also got theirs back in mint condition. So it was a happy ending for both sides.

Coming through shit like that always affects and changes a person but be proud of yourself for doing so. For some of the things you mentioned there can be really easy to hide and be embarrassed about it but clearly you're not or at the very least arent willing to let it keep you down so respect for that.

As for the hate that came your way from people for the most part it had absolutely nothing to do with the caws. It was more your attitude at times where you were coming off as extremely entitled and complaining a lot (which pretty much everyone in cmv has done at some point) especially over things that you yourself were doing and being hypocritical. Of course with all the things you mentioned it makes some of it understandable but I just wanted to try clear that up.

Glad to see you've come through it all and hope to see you only grow more as a person.

Solaris Arc wrote:

In spite of how controversial my CAWs have been, especially with Ascendance season where it felt like everyone was caving in on me because of Wolf.

There was 1 person who had your back

I joined the site in 2015 and was enraptured by this E-Fed thing. It was so cool to see my creation featured on a stream for more than just me to see. To see him triumph or lose (mostly lose) and to create stories. I've a numerous amount of issues in my life. I've burned a lot of bridges with members here. I've started tiffs with many members and some of them are my friends on this site now.

While I don't condone my actions when I started here. The things I've said; the interactions I've made, the people I've ruined relationships with. I'm happy enough that... while still a little bitch boi... I'm a little better than I use to be. It took almost 3 years or whatever. But, yeah. I've put whatever bitchiness I've had towards certain members behind me and now I can talk to someone, respectfully and honestly and we can get shit done.

CMV has been a trip and journey. And I've learned a lot while here. I've made some great friends and created some great relationships and I'm happy. I'm quite sorry to anyone and everyone I hurt or pissed off because I'm a twat.

This Season has probably been the most chill for me. Granted I wasn't here for most of it. But I've learned that while Winning is fun. I look more at the chat and just enjoy talking with people and shooting the shit. Community is the first word for our thing. And I feel like we've established quite a tight-nit one. I'm happy to be apart of it. CMV is my first and probably my only E-Fed and I wouldn't change.

I think I found myself very lucky to type in 2K15 roughly 3 years ago, see Dashing streaming his show and finding this community.

[ This post is a fucking mess and I'm sorry about it but yeah... ]

I've been in e-feds since 2011 and CMV is by far the best one I've been a part of. Sure, we don't always get along and had some rough times to be sure, but believe me when I say there's FAR WORSE places to be.

I'll hang around for a long as I'm able to. I still like this hobby and look forward to another season with all y'all.

My year sucked, but I don't want to bother you with my personal life, because I'm pretty sure y'all don't want to hear about it.

But as far as eFed. CMV was my first eFed that I join in 2016, and I've enjoyed it all. Which has inspired me to actually try and become a wrestler irl.

The other eFeds I've join since CMV never feel the same, probably won't, because CMV is my Home and each members are, not brothers n sisters, more like very close cousins.

Here's to another year. (Drinks a shot of Moonshine)

Alveuss wrote:
As for the hate that came your way from people for the most part it had absolutely nothing to do with the caws. It was more your attitude at times where you were coming off as extremely entitled and complaining a lot (which pretty much everyone in cmv has done at some point) especially over things that you yourself were doing and being hypocritical. Of course with all the things you mentioned it makes some of it understandable but I just wanted to try clear that up.

I personally don't think all that happened caused me to be like that. I was probably just like that from the get go. I've definitely tried making improvements in that department.

Topher Mod wrote:

Solaris Arc wrote:

In spite of how controversial my CAWs have been, especially with Ascendance season where it felt like everyone was caving in on me because of Wolf.

There was 1 person who had your back

bless u my boi