Where's Schmidty?

Standing outside the CMV HQ, right in front of the sign in the grass, we see a young man with brown spiky hair, blonde frosted tips, and a nice soul patch to accent the look. Most can recognize him as a YouTube sensation, a very controversial, independent reporter who does anything for a good story.

Brant Stephens
Ladies and Gentlemen, for those of you who know me, i'm Independent Reporter, Brant Stephens back at it again with another big story. This time, I have been hired by CMV to collect any and all information on former Undisputed Champion, Schmidty! For almost two years now Schmidty has been gone from the company after retiring due to a knee injury. Then suddenly a month ago it was announced that he'll be returning, in action against Randy Borton at Exodus. However, CMV has not been able to stay in contact with Schmidty. He's been very discreet so now it's my job to find out as much as possible so you, the fans, don't die of suspense on the build up to Exodus!

He then walks over to his vehicle, getting in the drivers side.

Brant Stephens
So, since Schmidty is off the radar, we will just have to interview the people of his past, hoping they can give us any information on the man in question.

And with that he drives off on his adventure.

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He pulls up to a large building in New York City before walking inside with his camera crew. Through the lobby he's addressed to the 23rd floor where he then finds his first interviewee. As he walks through all the cubicles, each with a deafening ring from the constant calls that seem to come in. Finally they make it to the cubicle they seek.

Ted Dickens
Hi thanks for calling Suicide Hotline. Don't do it.

He then looks over his shoulder to see the crew. So he hangs up and turns around to greet them with a handshake.

Ted Dickens
Hey! Nice to meet you, I'm Ted Dickens as you probably already know. Please sit.

Brant Stephens
I don't mind standing.

Ted shrugs and remains seated.

Ted Dickens
So has that Dashing finally croaked? You come here to make me full time commentator? I knew he'd hit the grave eventually from all them damn mountain dews he drank. That damn idiot.

Brant Stephens
We spoke on the phone, I wanted to talk about Schmidty.

Ted Dickens
Right! He is the greatest professional wrestler on the planet today! Nobody could even come close to being on his level. He's innovative, talented, charismatic, strong, and the guy is a goddamn genius in that ring. He can't be touched. I love him! Anybody who thinks they are better than him suffer from brain damage and need to call here so I can tell them to go ahead and do it because I'll be damned if they-

Brant Stephens
I just need to know if you've been in contact with him recently.

Ted Dickens
Sure have.

Brant Stephens
And? What did he say?

Ted Dickens
"Got any milk?"

Brant Stephens
Alright this is a waste of time. Onto the next person guys come on.

They leave the cubicle as Ted backs up in his office chair.

Ted Dickens
Screw you too buddy!

He then gets another call and picks up.

Ted Dickens
Suicide Hotline this is Ted..................damn it Kaiva, this is the third time you called today, I don't even work there no more I can't give you a job! Jump then see if I care........Kaiva? Kaiva???

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Next they pull up to a trashy looking trailer. The mail box looks like it was hit, considering it's lying in half on the hood of the pickup truck in the front yard with a large trench following it. They avoid the mess and walk up to the screen door. Inside they can hear multiple kids screaming. They can also hear the couple arguing at each other.

April Hurt
I CANNOT STAND YOU!

Bryce Hurt
THEN SIT DOWN!

Brant knocks on the door.

Brant Stephens
Excuse me! Bryce? We spoke on the phone.

Bryce comes to the door with a beer bottle in his hand, wearing boxers and a white wife beater.

Bryce Hurt
I don't even own a phone. What the hell you want bro.

Brant looks confused, but he's here now so he proceeds.

Brant Stephens
Well I was hired by CMV-

Bryce Hurt
Oh shit, they came crawling back huh? HEY APRIL!!

April Hurt
WHAT???????

Bryce Hurt
DON'T YELL AT ME!!

April Hurt
YOU YELLED AT ME FIRST BITCH!

Bryce Hurt
CMV is here wanting to give me my old job back!

April Hurt
Oh shit baby that's great!

Bryce Hurt
Right!?

Brant Stephens
Actually no, I was hired to collect intel on your friend who's coming back at Exodus. Schmidty? Or as you know him, Matt Schmidt. Have you been in contact with him?

Bryce looks pissed that they aren't there to hire him back.

Bryce Hurt
Bro get the fuck off my porch.

Brant looks down, and he's standing on grass.

Brant Stephens
You don't have a porch.

Bryce Hurt
Get outta here before I whip your ass!

Brant and his crew quickly load back up in his car.

Brant Stephens
Well, we can cross that one off the list.

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Up next they pull up to a large mansion surrounded by a metal gate. The gate opens up and they drive down the driveway. They notice a garage full of sports cars as they walk up to the front door. The entire time, Brant looks confused. He then rings the door bell as the man opens it up.

Cletus Barnickle
Well i'll be a son of a gun! Yens all made it!

Brant Stephens
This is quite the house you have here Cletus, I just didn't figure you were living this type of....lifestyle from what I've heard about you.

Cletus Barnickle
Oh well ya see, when I lost my match against that Darmon fella I just went back and finished by last semester of Law School. Couple years later after some wise intervestemates- um

Brant Stephens
You mean, investments?

Cletus Barnickle
Damn words. Yeah, after some of those here I am livin it up! So what do ya wanna know?

Brant Stephens
Have you by chance been in contact with Schmidty?

Cletus Barnickle
Sure have! I was his divorce attorney!

Brant Stephens
Woah what? He's no longer with Laura.

Cletus Barnickle
Nah, she split with the kid! That's all I know.

Brant Stephens
Thank you very much, who woulda thought you'd be the one to actually tell us something.

And with that, they pack up and head to their next destination.

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They drive along a dirt road and end up in the meeting spot for the next people on the list. Brant turns to see both members of Desolation making out on the hood of a Mustang while a photographer takes pictures and a sign on the side of the car that reads "Just Married."

Brant Stephens
Nope.

He keeps on driving.

Brant Stephens
While were they still wearing their masks?

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They continue their journey to a college in Boston. They pull up to a frat house where the door is already open and the yard is filled with empty beer cans. They just walk right in and see their person sitting on the couch making out with multiple women.

Brant Stephens
Uh...James?

James puts up a finger and continues his kiss. Finally he pulls apart as the woman basically faints from the passion he poured into that kiss.

James
Hey man what's up? Beer in the fridge.

Brant Stephens
I'm three years sober thanks. Uh...I thought you had already graduated college during your stint with CMV?

James
Nah I did, I'm a professor now bro.

Brant ignores the fact that he's making out with his students.

Brant Stephens
I'm just gonna cut right to the chase here man. I need to know what you know about Schmidty returning to Exodus. His other friends haven't told us much and he's off the radar it seems.

James
Well I guess I could tell you that we got pretty fucked up one night a few months ago and then he told me that he and Laura broke up.

Brant Stephens
Yeah I knew that.

James
Ahh, well, I also remember him faintly telling me how wrestling was his "missing piece" whatever that meant. Other than that, I blacked out that night, don't remember much.

Brant Stephens
Ahh, fair enough. Thanks for you time professor.

James
No problem bro!

And with that, he goes back to making out with the women while Brant makes his exit.

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Their last stop, is a nice well lit house in the country side surrounded by a field full of horses. As they follow the trail to the front door, they notice a few children's toys laying around before finally knocking on the door. And as the door opens up, for the first time in years we see Laura Sampson.

Brant Stephens
Hey i'm glad you returned my call before I returned to the HQ. I didn't really gather much.

Laura Sampson
Yeah come on in and have a seat on the couch.

Brant and his crew do just that.

Brant Stephens
No kiddo today?

Laura Sampson
He's visiting his grandpa for the week. So, what do you need to know?

Brant Stephens
Well now that you're single you wanna go out sometime?

Laura Sampson
No!

Brant looks into the camera and smiles.

Brant Stephens
Shot my shot folks! Alright, why did you and Schmidty get a divorce?

Laura Sampson
Well.....he became obsessed.

Brant Stephens
With what?

Laura Sampson
His "big return". He stopped being the kind, loving, family man he was and went back to being the Game Changer.

Brant Stephens
Like how he was before? When he first came to Fusion?

Laura Sampson
Yes and no. He's different for sure, and he still loved us it's just it felt like he loved the idea of coming back more. It consumed him. He would stare at the TV when the shows were on for hours, writing down notes and such. He sold his Antique Shop so he could focus more in the gym. I mean I was happy for him but he couldn't just balance everything. He could only be all in or not in at all. So we came to the conclusion that we're better separate.

Brant Stephens
I'm sorry to hear that. I honestly think that's enough information, i'd hate to keep pressing you. Thank you so much.

Laura Sampson
You sure you don't wanna stay? I am kinda lonely. And horny.

Brant Stephens
Nah I gotta get these clips to HQ. Thanks so much!

And with that, Brant and his crew head back to HQ and turn in their film for CMV to put together this nifty little special for you guys to watch, leading up to the triumphant return of one of the most controversial and entertaining figures to ever grace a CMV ring.